COACHING FOR ACCOMPANYING SPOUSES

C’est l’image d’un logo avec une famille dessinée en forme de cœur pour illustrer la situation des femmes accompagnant les conjoints expatriés et des hommes accompagnant les conjoints expatriés qui souhaitent bénéficier d’un coaching individuel ou collectif pour les accompagner dans leur vie professionnelle et transitions personnelles.

As an accompanying spouse or expatriate partner, you've become an essential family pivot in helping your expatriate family settle in and flourish. This requires a great deal of flexibility, adaptation and creativity on your part.

You're happy to have this experience abroad. Yet this choice has had an undeniable impact on your identity and your professional and personal life.

Today, you realize that it's not necessarily easy to reinvent yourself on expatriation or on your return, nor to relaunch yourself professionally with the label of “spouse of ...” or “partner of…”.

You're asking yourself a thousand questions about how to find your rightful place and establish a good life balance, not only for your family, but also for yourself!

Today, you find that:

You feel the need for a change, but don't know exactly what it is. Or maybe you often hear that, as an expatriate spouse, you must constantly learn to reinvent yourself, but you're wondering how?

By adopting this status, you've lost certain parts of your identity (professional, social, financial) and you need to reconnect with who you are beyond your role as accompanying spouse or your label as a “mom or dad of...”.

You'd like to get back to work, while ensuring a good life balance for you and your family.

You don't know how to make the most of your atypical career path as an expat spouse, how to justify that hole in your CV, how to approach the job market.

You'd like to clarify what you have to offer, how to promote it and communicate it to a potential future employer.

Because of your visa or constraints linked to the country you live in, you can't work.

You'd like to find out how you can fulfill your potential without a paid job. You have ideas for projects, but you can't figure out which one really excites you and how to reconcile it with your expat life.

Since your expatriation, you've changed, you no longer have the same desires and needs.

You want to make sure you're making the right decisions, the ones that will support you in making this return a success, personally, professionally and as a family.

You're thinking about retraining or a new career direction, but don't know how to go about it.

You have too many or too few ideas, you don't know what's realistic or not, what you can or can't aspire to.

You need to identify what would really suit you, and how to go about making it happen.

The label of accompanying spouse and all those years out of work have had a major impact on your self-image.

You have trouble letting go of the way others look at you, you're afraid of making mistakes, of failing! You'd like to boost your self-confidence and dare to be yourself! You feel the need to overcome your impostor syndrome.

You're constantly faced with a lack of visibility about what's next, the multiple changes, the loss of your financial independence and much more.

You'd like to gain the serenity and optimism you need to deal with what's in store for you as an expat.

You feel alone with your questions, and that no one really understands the difficulties you're facing.

You need support to help you clarify your situation and make the right decisions.

You're facing a big change: the birth of a child, the empty nest, a new expatriation, a burnout, approaching the 40s or 50s, the illness of a loved one, a return to work.

You want to navigate the ups and downs of this transition and bounce back with agility.

You want to prepare for your departure abroad, whether it's your first or umpteenth expatriation.

Your head is full of questions: What are the right questions to ask myself to get prepared? What do I need and want to adapt successfully? What will enable me to blossom fully in my new host country? How can I manage my relationships with my family and friends back home? How can I prepare my couple and family for this transition? How can I reinvent myself in such a way as to flourish? How do I deal with cultural shock? How do I manage my loss of financial independence?

You feel emotionally, psychologically and physically tired. This role of spouse at home is draining all your energy. You feel as if you've lost your way, and above all, you've lost your energy, vitality and optimism.

You're close to or facing a parental burnout, and you'd like to get your head above water. You feel the need to identify how to take better care of yourself so you can take better care of your loved ones.

Your observation today:

Tu voudrais te réinventer et t’épanouir avec ce statut de conjoint accompagnant, mais tu ne pas vraiment comment !

I know what you mean, I'm an accompanying spouse myself!

10 years ago, after more than 15 years of expatriation as an employee in positions of responsibility, I took on the role of accompanying spouse. Against all odds, it was one of the biggest challenges I'd faced in my 30 years of expatriation!

At the time, I saw it as an opportunity to be more present for my children, but I was soon caught up by the many challenges involved in this role.

Among other things, I found it hard to thrive in this status of “wife of...” and “mother of...”, and struggled with the way others looked at me, the lack of recognition for this essential role and the lack of support. I also had to face up to a rocky road from the moment I decided to go back to work.

I spent an enormous amount of time questioning myself, before managing to find my right place and a balance that would enable me to combine my husband's mobile and international career, my desire to be present for my children and my need for professional fulfillment.

In 2014, I trained in life and career coaching at New York University (NYU) and developed my expertise in life and career transitions, international mobility and issues related to the role of the accompanying spouse or partner.

Today, I'm committed to facilitating the personal and professional transitions of the expatriate spouses I accompany, to help them avoid the pitfalls I went through myself and enable them to realize their full potential.

With this in mind, I have created the method called TRANSITIONS for expat spouses. It provides a personalized support, adapted to the specific needs and challenges of accompanying spouses, whether before, during or upon return from expatriation.

To make the transitions in your life as an accompanying spouse a success, what you need most today is to reconnect with your inner Captain!

You're probably wondering what I'm talking about.

I'm referring to all those accompanying spouses, for whom their life has become so much their reality that they've forgotten how ready they are to take on challenges!

I bet you have too! Over time, with this label full of stereotypes, you've probably lost confidence in yourself, even though deep down you've got what it takes to succeed in the transitions of your personal and professional life!

Remember, the day you decided to leave your country, your job, your loved ones, you didn't take the easy way out, you made a courageous decision, you dared what the vast majority wouldn't! You agreed to give up everything to follow your partner. Your curiosity drove you to embark on this adventure, despite the social, professional and personal costs involved.

From there, you took on the role of Captain for all organizational, logistical and family aspects, to ensure the success of this expatriation and facilitate the well-being of the whole family!

You demonstrated leadership, creativity, resilience and many other skills!

That's why today, to create positive changes in your life as an expatriate spouse, what you need most of all is to awaken that part of you that has proven its ability to adapt, that incredible Captain in you!

By reconnecting with it, you'll then be able to clarify what you really want in all areas of your life! It's this alignment that will enable you to dare to take your rightful place in your personal, professional and family life, and establish a healthy balance for yourself and your whole family.

This is the path proposed in my TRANSITIONS program, adapted for expatriate spouses and accompanying spouses.

THE METHOD TRANSITIONS- 4 STEPS AND 1 POWERFUL LEVER TO BOOST POSITIVE CHANGES IN YOUR LIFE AS AN EXPAT SPOUSE.

THE METHOD TRANSITIONS

Step 1
Taking stock & Reconnection
Step 2
Alignment
&
Valorisation
Step 3
Vision
&
Affirmation
Step 4
Strategy
&
Action

+ The powerful Mindset & Resilience lever

© Nancy Bonamy

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Taking stock & Reconnection

  • Take stock of all areas of your life.
  • Highlight your needs and desires, and how to meet them.
  • Reconnect with who you are and draw on your own resources.
  • Unblock your limiting beliefs, doubts and fears.
  • Identify your energy leaks and recharge your batteries.
visuel Etape 2 du programme

Alignment & Valorisation

  • Revisit your life and career path to discover what makes you unique: your values, strengths, passions, qualities, flaws, experiences and skills.
  • Discover how to enhance your profile, turn your differences into assets and illustrate what you have to offer.
  • Formulate your life mission: the impact you wish to have in your work, on your loved ones, your community and the society in general.
visuel Etape 3 du programme

Vision & Affirmation

  • Clarify your vision and what you really want, for all areas of your life, in the short, medium and long term.
  • Define concrete goals that are ambitious, motivating, inspiring and realistic.
  • Communicate clearly who you are, what you have to offer and what you really want.
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Strategy & Action

  • Define an effective strategy to create the positive changes you desire.
  • Take action with confidence and determination to succeed in your life and career transitions.
levier-mindset-resilience

MINDSET & RESILIENCE

  • Cultivate a state of mind at the top of your game: regain confidence in yourself and in the future, dare to be optimistic, be open to opportunities, develop your perseverance.
  • Strengthen your mental, emotional, relational and physical resilience to face uncertainties, bounce back with agility and create lasting change.

A unique and effective method.

  • 100% ONLINE: Accessible wherever you are in the world.
  • STRUCTURED: A structured path through a training platform that guides your reflection process.
  • FLEXIBLE: Total flexibility around the framework. You set the goals you want to achieve; choose the issues you want to resolve and work on your personal and professional development.
  • HYBRID: Autonomous thanks to an online training platform AND supported thanks to fully personalized coaching sessions.
  • PROVEN: This method has proved its worth with the humanitarians I've accompanied over the past 10 years!
  • SCIENCE-BASED: It includes tools that promote professional and personal development, fulfillment and well-being. They have been scientifically tested and approved in studies conducted by leading psychologists.
  • SIMPLE AND CONCRETE TOOLS: The exercises, information and tools are simple and effective. They will support you well beyond this coaching program.

TARGETED, PERSONALIZED COACHING

FOCUS on YOUR profile as an accompanying spouse

A program tailored to your specific challenges and questions as an expatriate accompanying spouse:

  • First or multiples expatriations.
  • Before, during or on return from expatriation.
  • Possibility or impossibility of working abroad.
  • Opportunities and constraints in your host country.
  • Birth of a child or empty nest syndrome.
  • Whether you're a couple, separated, divorced or a single parent.

FOCUS on YOUR current needs as an expat spouse

A program tailored to your current needs. You can choose to work on “à la carte” themes to complement the TRANSITIONS method. For example, with a focus on.

  • Getting back on the job market.
  • Realizing a fulfilling personal project.
  • Working on your professional and personal development.
  • Well-being and life balance.
  • Preparing for a return home or a first expatriation.
  • Preventing parental or professional burnout.
  • Post-burnout orientation.
  • Self-confidence and imposter syndrome.
  • Professional retraining or reorientation.
  • Starting your own business.
  • Preparing for retirement or pre-retirement.

SUPPORT FOR CHANGE

  • Flexible, personalized support tailored to the constraints of your professional and personal life as an expat spouse.
  • A caring, positive and confidential environment.
  • A method combining reflection and concrete actions.
  • A holistic approach to positively impact all areas of your life.
  • Simple, effective tools to support you beyond the coaching session.
I’ve managed to redefine my 13 years as an expatriate spouse in a positive way, and no longer as a big gap in my CV with no professional experience.

Lydie Cohuet, Expatriate Spouse

The results are beyond what I had hoped for: I’ve found my path, I know what I want to do and how to do it, without fear of judgement and without having to worry about it!

Aline Mazuel, Expatriate Spouse

I’ve started to change about myself and feel completely ready and serene for my return to my home country, equipped with tools and a clear vision of what I want to be!

Sophie Panthou, Expatriate Spouse

THE BENEFITS OF THE PROGRAM TRANSITIONS

CLARITY & ANCHORING

You know:

  • Who you are today,
  • What you have to offer,
  • What you really want,
  • How to communicate it effectively, and
  • How to achieve it with a concrete action plan!

ENERGY & MINDSET

  • You've developed your self-confidence and overcome your imposter syndrome.
  • You've strengthened your mental and emotional resilience.
  • You're serene and optimistic about the future.
  • You've regained your energy and master how to recharge your batteries.
  • You know how to identify and overcome obstacles.

TRANSFORMATION

You have experienced a profound transformation by going through this virtuous circle of transformation:

  • Self-awareness
  • Self-understanding
  • Self-compassion
  • Self-care
  • Self-acceptance
  • Self-affirmation

As Carl Rogers said: “When I accept myself, then I can change.”

100% of the accompanying spouses I’ve worked with have created positive changes in their lives and careers!

MODALITIES OF THIS PROGRAM

INDIVIDUAL VIP COACHING

1 diagnostic coaching session of 1h30

7 individual 1-hour coaching sessions with access to the recording.

2 x 15 minutes of laser coaching during the coaching engagement or 30 minutes of laser coaching 3 months after the end of the coaching support.

8 self-guided training modules with exercises and audio.

3 autonomous training modules to work on your mindset and resilience.

Additional resources and exercises to suit your needs.

Feedback on your exercises.

An online assessment to identify your strengths and how to develop them.

Feedback on your application tools (CV, letters, LinkedIn profile, pitch)

Platform for your questions and concerns.

Personalized VIP support for the entire duration of the program

An exchange three months after the end of the program to take stock and maximize your chances of success.

GROUP COACHING

– *

8 group coaching sessions of 1h30 with access to the recording.

– *

8 self-guided training modules with exercises and audio.

3 autonomous training modules to work on your mindset and resilience.



An online assessment to identify your strengths and how to develop them.

– *

Platform for your questions and concerns.

Motivational video clips and self-coaching sections in the program.

*Possibility of adding this option to the package

INDIVIDUAL COACHING

Are you interested in individual coaching? You can contact me now to discuss whether this program is right for you.

GROUP COACHING

If you'd like to take part in the next group coaching, you can join the waiting list. I will be the first informed about the new cohort, but you're under no obligation to start the program!

Questions I get from accompanying spouses who want to know more about this program.

It's true that today, the vast majority of accompanying spouses are women! More than 80% are women.

However, I've decided to address both men and women here. On the one hand, because these figures are changing, and on the other, because I personally meet more and more men with this status.

What's more, I feel that by talking as much to male accompanying spouses as to female accompanying spouses, it's a way of changing the way we look at this status, which shouldn't be reserved exclusively for women.

Moreover, this status, often misunderstood and not at all valued, already creates a feeling of loneliness and exclusion. I think it's a pity that a man, on the pretext that this is a predominantly female status, should find himself even more isolated and excluded than accompanying spouses already are!

That's why I've decided to address both men and women on my site! You'll see, I sometimes speak in the feminine and sometimes in the masculine!

Yes, absolutely, because you'll know clearly who you are, what you have to offer, what you want, how to communicate it and how to make it happen. 

That's what's going to make you so strong when it comes to relaunching your career!

You'll also have regained your self-confidence. You'll be very clear about what you want to communicate in your job search! And above all, you'll have defined an effective strategy and action plan to land the job you're looking for.

If this is part of your coaching objectives, during the program you'll also have the opportunity to work on your CV, cover letters and LinkedIn profile, on which I can give you feedback.

From experience, I've found that as long as you're aligned with who you are, what you have to offer and what you really want, then you'll communicate it confidently in your CV and interviews... and that's what will make all the difference in landing a job!

This program is just what you need. It allows you to take stock of where you are today, what your needs and desires are, and from there, clarify what you really want for all areas of your life.

Some of the spouses I've coached chose not to relaunch their careers.

They have identified and implemented a personal project that was close to their hearts or put in place what they needed to achieve their full potential.

It all depends on your needs, preferences and desires. For both formulas, the method is identical. The only difference is the way I support you.

In my opinion, the main advantage of individual coaching is that it's 100% personalized, flexible and adapted to your needs and your way of working. Individual coaching is a tailored-made program!

On the other hand, the main advantage of group coaching is the interaction with other people in the same situation as you, which is highly motivating and enriching. Group coaching offers you a new community!

Some people prefer the intimacy of individual coaching, while others prefer the exchanges of a group. It's all very personal.

Between each coaching session (whether group or individual), please allow a minimum of two hours to complete the exercises on the training platform.

These exercises are there to guide you in your reflection and enable you to progress at your own pace. To do this properly, you need to set aside enough time to devote to it.

With individual coaching, it's easy: you just reschedule your appointment.

With group coaching, you have access to a recording of the group session. You can ask me questions before the session, which I can answer during the session, even if you're not there. All you’ll have to do is watch the replay.

Group coaching

Group coaching lasts 4 months. We have 8 sessions with a frequency of one session every 15 days.

Individual coaching

The duration of individual coaching depends on the frequency of our sessions. It will last 2 months if we meet weekly, 4 months if we meet fortnightly or 6 months if we meet every 3 weeks.

In general, I recommend a session every 15 days, but of course it's flexible, depending on your constraints! Many accompanying spouses decide to follow this program on a weekly basis, and it works wonders!

In general, I prefer individual coaching to last no longer than 6 months, because it's the regularity of our sessions that will enable you to make the most of your coaching.

In the introductory session, we can agree on the ideal frequency for you.

It's common for my clients to mention in their introductory sessions that they're afraid they won't make it! And yet, each and every one of them has achieved their coaching goals!  

At the very start of the coaching process, we define your coaching objectives together. That's how we'll make sure you achieve them by the end of the coaching session. 

As long as you commit fully to this program, you're guaranteed to leave with a better understanding of who you are, what you need and want, and what you really want, professionally, personally and in your family.

You'll also be equipped with a strategy and action plan that will help you make your life or career project a reality.

Nancy Bonamy accompanies humanitarians, expatriates and accompanying spouses who wish to create positive changes in their professional and personal lives. Nancy also works with humanitarian organizations and international companies wishing to support their employees, and their accompanying spouses, in their professional and personal transitions and development.

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